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THE PENTAGON — In news that has every sailor and Marine in the Department of the Navy literally wailing with inconsolable grief, President Trump recently announced the nomination of a former soldier to be the next Secretary of the Navy, thus officially replacing the “greatest naval hero of the last century,” Ray Mabus.

According to White House sources familiar with the decision, the president chose Philip Bilden, a former U.S. Army intelligence officer, for his myriad talents and abilities, though he lamented having to replace Mabus — a man universally beloved by the Navy and Marine Corps for being “a principled leader who never compromised his position to push his own political or social agendas,” Trump said.

via www.duffelblog.com